True Friendship
March 17
(From a Discourse of the Elders)
By Archpriest Victor Guryev
March 17
(From a Discourse of the Elders)
By Archpriest Victor Guryev
Toward certain people we sometimes feel a special love and enter into a bond of friendship with them. Friendship does not violate the commandment of love toward all without exception. The Lord Jesus Himself loved John, Peter, James, and Lazarus with a special love; and Saint Peter likewise especially loved Saint Mark; while the Apostle Paul loved Saints Timothy and Thekla. Gregory of Nazianzus was a friend of Saint Basil the Great. We need only to be careful in choosing friends and to know how to distinguish true friendship from harmful friendship. The bond of true friendship must consist in mutual encouragement toward progress in faith, piety, love for God, and for one’s neighbor. Christian friends in this case should be like travelers who, walking together along a difficult and slippery road, usually hold on to one another for mutual help and greater safety. A true friend in such a case is an irreplaceable treasure, which all the treasures of the world are not worth.
In the Monastery of Saint Theodosios, the head of a coenobitic community, there were two monks who loved each other so much that they made a mutual vow not to be separated from one another either in this life or in the future; and at first, by their virtuous life, they served as an example to all the brethren. But then a demon attacked one of them with such force that the monk did not stand firm, decided to go into the world, and began to tell his companion to let him go. The latter, though he tried to persuade his falling friend, could do nothing; and remembering the covenant of friendship, went with him into the world. The fallen brother began to give himself over to every kind of vice, while his friend did not cease to entreat him to abandon his evil deeds and return to the monastery. But the exhortations did not help, and matters went from bad to worse.
Meanwhile, in the city where they were staying, the Venerable Abraham was building a monastery, and both brothers hired themselves to work on the construction of the monastery. After the day’s labor, the fallen one continued to indulge in brutish pleasures, while his friend spent his time in silence, tears, fasting, and prayer. The report of his virtues reached the Venerable Abraham. He summoned the monk to himself and asked: “Where are you from, brother, and what is the reason for your being here?” The monk related in order about himself, about his friend, about his desire to save him, and about his sorrow for his behavior. Then the Venerable one, filled with the Holy Spirit, exclaimed: “Go, God has granted you the soul of your brother!”
No sooner had the monk departed from the Venerable one than his fallen companion approached him and said: “Beloved brother, take me into the desert — I wish to be saved!” Who can describe the joy of the holy ascetic! He immediately took his repentant friend, withdrew with him into the desert, and afterward, both having spent some time there in repentance, fasting, and prayer, and “having greatly prospered in God,” one after the other peacefully departed into the heavenly world.
Is it not true, brethren, that a true Christian friend is an irreplaceable treasure? And is it not true that such a friend, in certain circumstances, can serve for us as it were a Guardian Angel? Therefore, seek closeness with the pious, and your friendship with them will bear for you saving fruits. If you fall, your friend will raise you up; if you are weak, he will heal you. He will teach you to grow in piety and to live in accordance with the hope of eternal blessedness; he will lift your spirit from earth to heaven, and his zeal for holiness will inevitably pass on to you. And how precious will your friendship with such a person be! It will be holy, for it will be inspired by the spirit of piety and love for God. It will be a path to eternal blessedness. This path is difficult, but its difficulty is eased by the fact that friends zealous for piety help one another to walk this path and, with mutual assistance, attain the Kingdom of Heaven. Amen.
Source: Translated by John Sanidopoulos.