By Fr. Ioannis Papadimitriou
Many times, out of good intention,
some people leave an electric candle
on the grave of their loved ones.
It is not bad in the sense of sin,
but our Church has taught something deeper.
We do not light the vigil lamp or the natural candle
because our departed are afraid of the darkness.
They do not need it in order to “see.”
The oil symbolizes the mercy of God
which drips like balm
upon our suffering souls,
and the candle symbolizes the person who melts
little by little from sacrificial love;
and because love is not activism or an idea,
but becomes incarnate in the Person of Christ,
who is both Light and Life,
as it burns it spreads light all around!
Therefore, when
we light the vigil lamp and the candle
we are not simply making
a practical church gesture,
but it is as if we silently say in prayer:
“Lord,
as this lamp, this candle burns,
so may Your Mercy, Your Light
also extend to the souls we entrust to You.”
The candle and the vigil lamp do not exist
to move us aesthetically.
They are not decoration.
They are a way for the heart to turn toward God.
When we chase atmosphere,
we easily lose prayer.
The Church does not create atmosphere,
but helps us
cultivate a relationship with God.
There is also something else
we often encounter at graves:
artificial flowers.
Not from negligence, but from fear —
lest the grave appear “empty,”
lest people say
we did not care for our loved ones.
Yet the Church often speaks
not so much about the empty
as mainly about the false.
The artificial flower, yes, does not wither,
but it does not live either — and you know,
our loved one has not ceased to exist.
Meanwhile nature
has given us other solutions:
there are hardy plants that live with little water.
Finally, it is true that
graves have become an extension of our home,
yet we forget we are not alone.
The water and leftovers of our care
do not need to be poured just anywhere…
How many abandoned graves
have become dumping grounds…
If we do not learn to respect those around us,
we will hardly truly honor
the one who rests in the grave.
It is a pity that because of misunderstandings
(which our passions nourish)
cemeteries, from places of prayer,
are distorted into neighborhood courtyards.
God forbid…
Source: Translated by John Sanidopoulos.
