Homilies from the Menaion for Every Day of the Year: September 8

 

 

The Month of September

8th Day

9. What Parents Should Do if They Desire Their Children to Grow Up as Good and Godly People

(From a homily on the Nativity of the Most Holy Theotokos. Menaion, September 8)

All parents, perhaps we may say, even without exception, naturally desire that their children should grow up to be good and godly people. Even the most wicked person, we see, punishes his child when the child has done something wrong, thereby showing that he too, although he himself is wicked, nevertheless wants his son to grow up good and not evil. Thus, the desire to see one’s children good is, one may say, the desire of all parents. But we would add only this, which we do not think is superfluous: although the desire is the same among all, its fulfillment is not the same for everyone. With some, the children turn out good, while with others they are wicked. And what follows from this? In our opinion, it is that it is not enough for parents merely to desire that their children should turn out good; they must also know what they, as parents, need to do so that their desire may become a reality. What, then, must they do?

First of all, they themselves must be good and godly. Why did the Lord reward Joachim and Anna with the Most Blessed Daughter? Because of their piety. Thus Saint John of Damascus says: “O blessed spouses Joachim and Anna! Truly, from the fruit of your womb you were shown to be blameless, according to the word of the Lord: ‘By their fruits you shall know them.’ As it was pleasing to God, so you rightly ordered your life in a manner worthy of the One who was born from you. For, living chastely and in holiness, you brought forth the Treasure of virginity, I mean the Virgin” (Homily on the Nativity of the Most Holy Theotokos). The same is also written in the Life of the Forefathers of God: “That pair surpassed all others in their virtues and was found worthy before God to give birth to the Mother of God. For such a gift would not have been granted to them had not their righteousness and holiness surpassed those of others” (Life of Joachim and Anna, Chet-Minei, September 9). Again, why did the Lord reward Zechariah and Elizabeth with John? Once more, because of their piety. “Both,” it is said, “were righteous before God, walking in all the commandments and ordinances of the Lord blamelessly” (Luke 1:6).

But you will say that these examples are too exalted for us and are exceptional examples. In that case, let us turn to other saints. What, for example, were the parents of Saint Dimitri of Rostov? “They were of noble birth, adorned with faith and Christian piety, and walked unwaveringly in the commandments of God.” What were the parents of Saint Sergius like? Noble, holy, and godly. Those of Cyril of Belozersk? The same. Those of Isaiah, Bishop of Rostov? Those of Saint Theodosius of the Caves? The same. But why should we labor to multiply examples? There are so many that can be found in the Lives of the Saints that, truly, we would not have enough time to relate them all. Read the Lives of the Saints, and you will convince yourselves of the truth of our words concerning the fact that, for the greater part of those children who later became saints, their parents also were holy and godly.

But let us continue our discourse. What else, besides piety, is required of parents who desire to see their children good and godly? They must also raise their children in piety from an early age. How was the Most Holy Theotokos raised? “As the Virgin Mary grew,” it is said, “her parents guarded her as the apple of their eye ... They raised her with such vigilant care as was fitting for her who was to become the Mother of the Savior” (Life of Joachim and Anna, September 9). How were the saints raised, especially those who shone forth in our own fatherland? Again and again we read in their Lives: “The child was raised by his parents in the fear of God and instructed in the Christian law,” and so forth. Or, for example: “Born of the faithful, he was raised in piety. He was then given by his parents to be instructed in the divine books,” and so on. And this, so to speak, without number. From all this it is also clear that raising children in piety should give parents very great hope that their children will later become good and godly people.

And in conclusion, in view of all that has been said, strive, parents who desire to have good children, so that your desire may become a reality; strive, first of all, to be yourselves examples to your children of true piety and virtue, so that your life may be a light for your children, so that your piety and virtues may be passed on as an inheritance to your children and may grow and multiply in them for their salvation and yours. While setting an example of piety for your children, also take care of their upbringing in other respects. Teach them the law of God; instill in their hearts a fervent love for God and the fear of God; teach them to love their neighbors; keep them away from evil company and evil deeds; wisely punish and correct their transgressions; and, in general, keep them away from everything evil and accustom them to everything good. And if you act in this way, then you may fully hope that, in due time, from the good seeds sown in the hearts of children, you will also receive good fruits. Amen.

Questions for Discussion 9

1. Why did the Lord reward Joachim and Anna with the Most Blessed Daughter?

2. How did the parents of John the Forerunner—Zechariah and Elizabeth—walk according to all the commandments and ordinances of the Lord?

3. With what were the parents of Dimitri of Rostov adorned?

4. What should our life be for our children?

5. What should we pass on as an inheritance to our children?

 

Source: The Cheti-Minei: Homilies for Every Day of the Year (Book 1: September, October, November) by Archpriest Viktor Guryev. Publication of the Russian Panteleimon Monastery on Mount Athos, 1896. Translated by John Sanidopoulos.